Diary Entry: 25th October 2024
The Diary of a CEO who just bought a business – Month 6
So I have decided that this will be my last entry in this chapter, because all of a sudden it doesn’t feel like I “just” bought a business anymore.
It feels like we are very much established in this new era of The Mortgage Mum Limited.
And October has brought me more of a deep sense of achievement than any of the previous 5 months.
Yes, it feels like I am finally turning a corner.
That elusive corner that I have felt was so far out of my reach all year, but all of a sudden I can feel is right here. With every step I take.
I suddenly feel…. different.
More confident.
More sure of myself.
More empowered.
Clearer.
Happier.
There could be a multitude of reasons why.
– Am I finally recovering from having Jack? (They say it takes a woman 2 years to fully feel like “herself” after giving birth & we’re 18 months in and still breastfeeding, but every month I can feel more of “me” coming back)
– Am I more settled in my role as CEO? Now that the imposter syndrome has worn off, my inner voice has settled a little.
– Are some of the changes that I have made within the company starting to take shape and settle? It’s been a huge time of adjustment, but every micro decision has been carefully considered and it feels so good seeing the results
– Is it because the company branding shoot brought a buzz that has lasted all month, and is still going? I can’t wait to share the images!
– Is it because we have new members in the team, who inject even more enthusiasm, trust and energy into the amazing Mortgage Mum community? We’ve welcomed 4 and we love them all!
– Or is it the validation of a Women’s Recognition Awards win, and another segment on ITV’s This Morning, with a brand deal too? I’m not going to pretend validation isn’t still a key driver for me.
I think it could be all of these things, but I also think it’s more than that.
– Is it because I have done something for ME in the last month? Outside of work.
I signed up for an 8 week health & fitness shred, counting steps, calories and workouts.
It sounds like “another thing to do” doesn’t it…
But here’s the thing.
It’s not about the shred.
There is a confidence and an inner trust that comes from SAYING to yourself you’re going to do something and DOING it.
And equally it can be very damaging when you don’t.
And I genuinely think that’s what it is.
This past month I have built trust in myself.
And as a result I am letting go of what others think.
I’m someone who has spent my life wondering and worrying about other people’s opinions of me.
Letting them decide if I was good enough.
But I can feel that behaviour is starting to shift.
So month 6 – I am so grateful for you.
Without a doubt, you have been one of my favourite months of the year.
And I cannot WAIT to see what’s next.
Maybe a new title for these entries. Any ideas? The current one is a bit too Stephen Bartlett for me!
How’s your month been?
