“Women supporting women, you know, these have become buzzwords, but it’s true if we get behind each other. It’s like magic.” Sarah Tucker
What inspired this episode?
The very foundation of The Mortgage Mum has been built on the concept of ‘women supporting women’ and I see evidence of it every single day.
Women need to be managed differently.
I know that this is a really bold statement, but I also know it’s true. If you are a woman here now, you need to be telling your leaders about this episode to make sure that this message gets spread. Let me know how this resonates with you. We don’t all have to agree, but it’s a really good and important topic of conversation.
A big reason why I launched The Mortgage Mum was to bring women into the financial services industry, into what is a very male dominated space...
The mortgage industry is male dominated and recently an AMI report came out that demonstrated this along with other minority groups – so there’s still a lot of work to do in the industry!
There’s also a lot of people still experiencing really negative things in regards to their gender, their race and/or their disabilities. I’m very passionate about the difference between women and men in terms of management. I own a nearly all female company and I’ve been accused in the past of being sexist because I have a company built on female brokers!
To be clear, we don’t exclude men from applying here, but there are hundreds of mortgage companies out there that are suitable for men and that are designed with a male in mind. And there’s nothing wrong with that…
Another thing I get accused of is elbowing men out of the way. It is not about elbowing men out of the way. It’s about standing next to them. I talk a lot about Martin Lewis and I talk a lot about standing next to him one day. I think there’s another voice that can be heard there, a female voice talking about money and financial matters. I just think it would be great for women to see another woman talking about this stuff and in a different way that they understand. I just want to be talking about it collectively and having different approaches to how we do that.
The Mortgage Mum is about bringing women into a space that is otherwise described as unsafe or unsuitable for them, particularly if they have children.
Women are put off because they don’t see many other women doing it and the women they do see doing it, they don’t resonate with, they don’t think they like them. For example, they don’t have children or maybe they’re ‘suited and booted’ – not every woman operates like that.
Why do I believe women need to be managed differently to men?
Well, first of all, we are very emotional. We have hormones, we cycle, and we have different stages in our life. That brings different emotions and hormones that we have to understand. Behind the scenes we talk about those cycles. We bring in experts and healers and talk about these subjects and what our body is telling us it needs.
As mothers we constantly override what our bodies need. At certain times of the month we need rest, chocolate and a couple of quiet days. But our lives do not account for it. And at The Mortgage Mum you can absolutely work under a blanket when you need to!!
If you work from home, you can still be effective. It’s about being aware.
For me, I’m becoming more aware of my diary. So in the ‘middle phase’ of my cycle I am so much better. I am high energy, high vibe, positive, excited. I’m planning for the future. I’ve got lots of new ideas.
However, I am like a different human for the week leading up to my time of the month. I just feel so much lower. I feel tired. Things overwhelm me quicker and so during this time I try to specifically not put things in that require a lot of energy, such as speaking gigs.
I do think for that reason, a self-employed life can really suit a woman because they can manage that. They can become the controller of their diary a little bit more.
The other thing is obviously empathy. We’ve been pitted against each other subconsciously for a really long time, this takes me back emotionally to consuming “who wore it best” articles and what those body image features do to our subconscious. This takes us away from our own power.
That’s why when I created The Mortgage Mum. It’s not about competing, it’s about choosing to support each other – women supporting women. These have become buzzwords, but it’s true if we get behind each other, it’s like magic. I witness this magic every day in The Mortgage Mum.
I’ve got to be realistic, even sometimes I get triggered by different women online. So I believe that a different management technique is needed and the awareness of the conditioning we’ve had of the pressures we put ourselves under.
Speak to an expert
We will work at times that suit you and your family, carrying out appointments via video call, telephone or email, giving you the benefit of first class service, around your own schedule, and in the comfort of your own home. So let us handle your mortgage today and find out how well we can look after you, The Mortgage Mum way!
Guilt is a very real thing...
If you are a working mum, you’re almost apologetically working twice as hard to prove yourself to somebody who believes that because you are maybe part-time, or because you have children, that you’re part committed. This is ridiculous. Guilt is a very real thing – whether it’s having a career AND being a mother, not being on top of the laundry or wondering why other women have everything in ‘perfect’ order and perfectly pleated skirts. Guilt even down to the conversations around us surrounding breastfeeding vs bottle feeding. Combined, it is all a lot…
Guilt is just such a horrible emotion. So as a woman, you have so much going on and traditionally, a lot of the admin tasks fall on our lap and men need managing differently too – especially in these competitive sales environments, not forgetting the office banter too.
Women deserve to be seen, appreciated and understood.
We’re pitted against each other because we have compassion and empathy, and we don’t want to be seen to be a certain way. We want to be praised. We want to be seen, we want to be heard. We want to be appreciated. That’s the main desire of a woman in my team.
I want to be appreciated too. Is that something you feel? Show the females in your team appreciation.
We like detail. We like to feel like you’re organised. If you’re a leader of women, we like to feel like you’ve heard us, that you see us, that you see everything and you understand what’s happening in the background.
Management of a woman involves a lot of energy and it involves a lot of care and we have a culture of care here and I take it really seriously. If you treat any staff member right, the magic they can achieve, it’s amazing to witness. So do invest your time into it because honestly they hold so much magic. There is magic in the women in your team. You’ve just got to manage them differently to find it.
Don’t get me wrong – there’s some women on our team who are just as competitive as any male out there. But is that because that’s the environment they’ve had to succeed at previously? What we should be asking our teams is if they need our support and to make sure they are okay.
Finally, if you’re a woman here now, take a look at your diary and see if there’s any adjustments you can make to just treat yourself a little bit more kindly…
Listen to The Mortgage Mum Podcast on all major podcast directories including Apple and Spotify. You can also catch up on previous episodes on our website and on The Mortgage Mum YouTube channel.